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mechanical bull

by zannie

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about

I wrote mechanical bull after waking up from a particularly vivid dream involving the fusion of various bull mythos: namely the bull of heaven, the Minotaur of Minos, and the modern mechanical bull. The dream followed a dysfunctional family on vacation. At the end, the father became obsessed with a giant glowing mechanical bull in a maze beneath a deserted house the family entered to call for help. The twins went down to the basement to look for their father, and happened upon an underwater mirror room where they converged into one entity. The father spent the rest of his days following the mechanical bull through the maze. Here the bull is both the solution and problem...the mechanical bull represents a system of our own creation we're forced to hop back on again and again. Yet that mystic bull can also represent the comfort one can access feeling the weight of their body on the earth, and not needing to be perceived to exist. Quite simply it's tough out here, give yourself a hug!

lyrics

is there such a thing as real or fake
i'm watching the shadows on the sidewalk break
selling off my kisses by the side of lake
i'm watching the dove fly away with the cake
and i'm thinking about
the mechanical bull of heaven
looked it straight in the eye and fell into a shell
in that moment i wanted nothing, nothing more than myself
it dances and quivers, navigating the maze
i fumble with the airlock then capitulate
is there such a thing as real or fake
i press my cheek to the stuff dark matter generates
fall in love with the wheel or get crushed by the game
cuz nothings ever static or just more of the same
and i'm thinking about
the mechanical bull of heaven
looked it straight in the eye and fell into a shell
in that moment i wanted nothing nothing more than myself
in that moment i wanted nothing nothing more than myself

credits

released December 9, 2021
recorded and performed by zannie
single artwork by ada babar

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all rights reserved

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zannie Brooklyn, New York

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